Many of you find yourselves reading this in the midst of your church’s fall generosity campaign. It is that time of the year when many congregations take a look back at all that God has done even as you dream about the ministry in which you want to engage in the coming year, and how you might fund that ministry. What themes, stories, or pie graphs can you use to inspire a little more generosity in light of shrinking congregations, inflation, and deferred maintenance costs? We wonder, especially during our fall campaigns, “How do we create, cultivate, and/or inspire generosity?”

I’ve been asking the same question, albeit for somewhat different reasons. Earlier this fall, my wife and I dropped off our oldest child to college for his freshman year. It was a big day for everyone involved. He was ready. We were (mostly) ready, if you ignore the five different trips to Target and Walmart on move-in-day. He was excited. We were (mostly) excited, as he transitioned from the narrowness of home into the spaciousness of his early adult life.

As we said our goodbyes I wondered what final nugget of fatherly wisdom I was supposed to share with him? What magic piece of advice could I give him to ensure he would be successful, kind, and generous? Those of you who are wiser and more experienced in such things know that there are no magic words.

It doesn’t matter if it is a season in the life of a family or in the life of a church, the most powerful lessons are the ones that happen in consistent and authentic ways over a long period of time. If our son goes to college and is kind and generous, it will not be because of some parting words of wisdom, it will be because he grew up in a house where kindness and generosity were embodied and practiced, even if that practice was imperfect.

The same is true in churches. I get the impression that we think that if only we have the perfect fall campaign, where we say the perfect words, then maybe we can balance our church budget. But, generosity is cultivated in the slow, consistent, and intentional work of modeling and inspiring generosity throughout the year. There isn’t anything wrong with sharp fall campaigns and catchy themes. But the real work of inspiring generous Christians happens year-round.

The people who support the work and worship of our congregations will live generous lives when they experience generosity not just as a word to get them to increase their pledge, but as a character trait that is developed from following in The Way of Jesus. They will embody generosity as they hear stories of the way others in a congregation have experienced generosity as givers and as receivers. They will experience generosity as they are reminded again and again and again of grace as Karl Barth described it as the movement from narrowness into spaciousness.

I am convinced that generosity begins to grow when we realize that we are free to move from the narrowness of self-interest into the spaciousness of community. It expands as we move from a narrowness that exclaims, “but we’ve always done it that way,” into a spaciousness that suggests, “let us discover what the Spirit has in store for us next.” Generosity thrives as we move from the narrowness of fear and scarcity into the spaciousness of abundance and gratitude. Generosity isn’t cultivated during a short campaign as much as it is inculcated in a lifetime of doing church together.

The last words I said to my son as we left to begin our long drive home were, “I love you so much and remember that we are here if you need us.” I really do think he’s going to be fine. He’s kind and generous because he knows he is loved and he’s got a place to which he can return. Maybe the people we hope will support our churches need to hear the same thing. “You are loved, and this church is here if you need us.” That may not be where generosity ends, but it might be where it begins.