Let the Life I’ve Lived Speak for Me…

When I come to the end of this road

And I lay down my heavy load

Let the life I’ve lived speak for me….

One Sunday morning, I circled back to thank a dedicated usher. She had welcomed, greeted, escorted and cared for me on arrival, and she was in the sanctuary long after most departed, taking care of the sacred space. I thanked her.

She looked up at me and smiled: “Folks here tell me that this is my second home. I say, ‘No it’s not.’” She paused dramatically with a twinkle in her eye, and said, “I tell them, ‘This is my first home.” I touched my heart, sharing, “How beautiful, and thank you!”

I asked if I could share her words and have often done so. I have carried her amazing testimony with me ever since.

Our lives and the way we live them communicate our values. How we live, and find our deepest meaning, joy and yes — home. For so many of us, our faith — and how we have lived it — is our first and eternal home. As a pastor, I always knew that we are all sermons in shoes. We don’t just talk the talk; rather, we must walk the talk. On some level we all know this. “Do what I say, not what I do” is a feeble, perhaps even futile, way to live, especially if we want to pass our most precious heritage to future generations.

As a Ministry Relations Officer here at the Presbyterian Foundation, I am often asked on the periphery of meetings and presentations, “What can we do about children and grandchildren that no longer attend church?” In response to this tender challenge, I point to a hopeful pathway that is quite accessible but not always employed.

I tell them to talk about legacy. Discuss, plan and leave a legacy that points the way to what you have valued the most. In that way, you will be sending a love letter in a bottle to the future of your loved ones. As they reflect on and cherish the values you have lived, you may influence them now and into the future. I hear those stories as well, stories of why a person decided to go back to church in later life.

Legacy discussions and actions sow the seeds of our deepest values.  We can begin right now to invite those conversations about faith, values and choices around practical actions that reflect our love for God and respect for each other. One way to do so is through establishing a donor advised fund (DAF), which is similar to a family foundation. DAFs are one of the fastest growing charitable vehicles for their flexibility and advantageous benefits. The Presbyterian Foundation makes it easy to set up a DAF online.

DAFs serve as a great vehicle to have family discussions about values. Imagine a time of prayer and discussion over the holidays. Each family member could make grants from the DAF and values can be shared and explored. Wonderful sharing and learning can take place as we share and transmit our support of special heart felt causes with those we love. My colleague Joseph Moore, also a Ministry Relations Officer here at the Foundation, sits down with his family each December and discusses which organizations should receive grants that year. His children play an active role in selecting the ministries, and that has become part of the family’s legacy.

As 2025 yields to 2026, I hope we all find joy as we support our faith home and transmit our values to future generations. The legacy tools, resources and support of the Presbyterian Foundation are always as close as your nearest Ministry Relations Officer. We are so very grateful to serve you.